What does it mean to be your true self?

By Grace Hui for Incentre

In this day and age, it has become fashionable to talk about being your “authentic self” or to be “true to yourself” - while we may all loosely understand what these terms and phrases mean, are we really all on the same page? Have some of the original meanings behind these words become confused and diluted? 

I think we can all agree that in order to be “authentic” and “real” we shouldn't pretend to be what we are not, or do things that do not align with our core beliefs or true nature. A universal example of this would be to not pretend that we have a perfect life, and to acknowledge that everyone has struggles and problems; this is just a part of life and human nature, not something we should be ashamed of or try to hide.

With social media specifically, it can be tempting to present a curated version of one's life which has no bearing on reality, or is not a true reflection of our authentic life. This creates distortion, potential jealousy or envy, and undue pressure to “keep up with the Jones”, meaning to keep up with this version of yourself that is not the real you, that you have created and portrayed.

Alternatively, you may get sucked into the drama of problems and chaos presented by others, who might be rebelling against the idea of perfection. Have you noticed that some posts that create outrage, spark emotions and wallow in patterns of behaviour get a lot of traction? Some of these posts have been presented as “authentic”, but are in reality enforcing a pattern of behaviour that encourages us to be stuck in the drama of the situation. 

Is this more about being attached to the drama of apparent authenticity than genuine authenticity? 

In both of these instances there is separation from the truth of who we are, but it is masked by the label of “authenticity”. In our quest to be “authentic” have we instead built up more layers of lies? Not only lies to others but worst of all, the lies to the self.

As the saying goes: “The lies we tell other people are nothing to the lies we tell ourselves.”

What does authenticity mean? 

It is common knowledge that "the worst lies we tell are the lies we tell ourselves", yet it is something not enough of us truly live by. This does not mean we should blame ourselves or others for not living authentically 100% - in order to achieve this we need self awareness, self confidence, and to really understand what living in line with our true self and authenticity means.

Being "true to yourself", or your "authentic self", means thinking and acting in ways that align with your true feelings, core values and morals; as opposed to putting on a persona, trying to act in a way that you think others would respect or like, or align yourself with societal norms or an other person's needs or values. 

Being your true self does NOT mean that you are selfish or stubborn as some people wrongly understand, it simply means that you are aware of your own needs and personal goals, and your habits and behaviours consistently match up to what you want and who you are in your true nature.

THE SHADOW OF THE BRANDING OF AUTHENTICITY

The use of the word “branding” is deliberate, because there is a difference between being authentic and seeking attention through a toxic loop of dramatic problems under the guise of “authenticity”. 

For most of us, life will be a varied mix of good and bad experiences. If we repress the bad and refuse to deal with the triggers or issues that come with it in order to present an image of perfection, it is clearly not authentic. On the other hand, if we only dwell on the bad and go into a spiral of “woe is me” on repeat, that isn't being authentic either - and both can be immensely damaging to the self (which will then have a knock-on negative affect on those around us; friends, family members or romantic relationships).

Where we choose to put our focus can often be subconscious, which is why it's important to ask ourselves: Are we unwittingly addicted to drama? Or are we unconsciously refusing to acknowledge the areas in our life where we may have trauma or pain? Has the term “authenticity” become a convenient banner to hide behind? Are we using “authenticity” to remain in the spiral of problems? Or, are we using the label of “authenticity” to pretend we have no problems?

In order for us to progress, we need to undertake this reality check so that we can drop the masks and genuinely see and be our true selves. 

How do we really know ourselves enough to see the nuances? 

Are we empowered enough to see through our own negative egos and face our shadows with love?

After all, there is no deception like self deception.

How can we live a more authentic life?

Sometimes, in order to live authentically - or develop a higher self esteem and connection to our core identity in order to do so - we need to follow a path of self discovery. We don't always have a good sense of self and what is in our highest good, and so we may need to find this out in order to feel authentic and happy within ourselves. 

A lot of what is presented as “authenticity” seems to be an attachment to emotions and feelings. 

However, we are not our emotions or our feelings: Emotions and feelings are to be expressed and released, they do not define us nor are they meant to be held within us or consistently ruminated upon. They are an expression - 'nothing more nothing less'. They are transient! Please allow them to pass!

In any lineage-based spiritual path that is still pure, we are taught not to get attached to emotions that our experiences bring - this includes not being attached to feeling good! 

Being authentic isn't about feeling good. Nor is it about feeling bad: It is about seeing ourselves, where we need to improve, where our pain lies and where we need healing, without attachment to the emotions that come with those issues. 

If we can see the reality of where we are at, we can then take the steps needed to improve.

We can love ourselves while also accepting the truth of our imperfection. After all, isn't that what real authenticity is about? It is about seeing reality - not drama or repression.

As Ipssisimus Dave Lanyon of the Modern Mystery School said : “There is only one perfection in existence and that is when one is attempting to continue to perfect, then they are perfect.” To illustrate the point, he said : “You are not perfect the way you are. Your parents weren't lying to you as a child, but put away childish things now and be honest with yourself. Is there really no room left to improve?”

Being authentic is really about being honest to the self - and to be genuinely honest with yourself, you have to be empowered to know thyself.

Of course, this isn't going to be easy. Any path that is worth its weight in gold will never be easy. But is it worthwhile, enriching and rewarding? You bet! Is it the path to complete freedom? YES!

KNOWING THYSELF

The secret to happiness and fulfilment in life is to be our authentic self, which we can only do if we truly know ourselves!

Knowing oneself deeply is not going to be something that can be accomplished overnight; it requires commitment and dedication. However, following a path that thousands have walked before you can make things easier. This is a path that all of the great masters have walked:

In the ancient lineage of King Solomon through the Modern Mystery School, there is a clear path of progression, which begins with a Life Activation. 

Unlike a healing session, the Life Activation session activates a dormant aspect of our being. 

Through this, your awareness will expand, thus bringing about a fuller understanding of who you are, what your divine purpose is, and how to express your gifts and power in alignment with the light. In a time honoured protocol, this sacred session literally brings down and anchors more light into your energy structure, bringing much greater clarity and illumination. 

After a Life Activation, the next step, should you be willing, would be the Empower Thyself class and initiation.

True to the ancient system of human progression as handed down in the mystery schools over thousands of years, this class and initiation will give you the metaphysical tools and understanding to live your life in connection with your own strength, power and sovereignty and to let go of external influences (e.g. judgements or opinions, the fear of what society or others think of you) which might have been limiting your choices in the past. 

This initiation is a new beginning - and starts a journey of deep transformation that leads you right back to the source of yourself. 

The Life Activation and the Empower Thyself initiation are great tools that allow you to drop all pretenses and lies to yourself so that you can truly progress - releasing old and limiting beliefs and patterns of behaviours, without the need to pretend to be anyone else other than who your higher self is. 

WHAT IS INITIATION?

In the ancient mystery school traditions, to ‘initiate' means to begin a process, to start something. Initiation sets forces in motion for your own personal metamorphosis, transformation, growth and spiritual journey. 

Initiation serves to ground the spiritual energies we are wielding, such as light, power and protection. These forces become anchored into our energy field, so that we are able to readily access these energies through our mental, emotional and physical capacities to support us in our daily life choices, tasks and actions.

The handing down of knowledge that prepares one for initiation creates a template for living an empowered life, opening up the potential to master ourselves and to create the life which our higher selves truly desire. The initiation then activates this knowledge with spiritual power to support us to be in alignment with our highest and best good, to discover and live out our purpose here on earth.

The advancement of our connection with ourselves is the process known as “Know Thyself.” 

Initiation advances and catalyses this process, exposing us to our own highest purpose and the potentialities available to you in our lives.

In a nutshell

Because we each have our own baggage, wounds and hurts, we can easily bring these into all aspects of our lives, if left unchecked and unhealed. These projections can distort the truth and blind us from reality. The distortions mean that not only do we hurt others; they distract us from our divine selves and lead us away from the paths that we are meant to take.

“Above all, don't lie to yourself. The man who lies to himself and listens to his own lie comes to a point that he cannot distinguish the truth within him, or around him, and so loses all respect for himself and for others. And having no respect he ceases to love.”

Are we hiding behind the brand of authenticity to mask the truth? Do we even know the difference? Can we discern?

It is in truly knowing and understanding ourselves that we can really be authentic, and it is living in genuine authenticity that allows us to live in complete freedom.

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If you feel called to walk the path, you may start your first step with a simple Life Activation. Contact us at contact@incentrelondon.com to learn more.